Rockober
03-06-2008, 06:06 AM
? ? ? ? ? ?
> �
> When Grandma Goes To Court
> �
>
> �
> Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't
> prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting
> attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the
> stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She
> responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since
> you
> were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie,
> you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them
> behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the
> brains
> to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
> pusher. Yes, I know you.'
> �
> The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
> the
> room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
> �
> She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
> youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
> can't
> build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of
> the
> worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with
> three
> different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
> �
> The defense attorney nearly died.
> �
> The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a veryquite
> voice,said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send
> you both to the electric chair.'
> �
> When Grandma Goes To Court
> �
>
> �
> Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't
> prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting
> attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the
> stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She
> responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since
> you
> were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie,
> you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them
> behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the
> brains
> to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
> pusher. Yes, I know you.'
> �
> The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
> the
> room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
> �
> She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
> youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
> can't
> build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of
> the
> worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with
> three
> different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
> �
> The defense attorney nearly died.
> �
> The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a veryquite
> voice,said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send
> you both to the electric chair.'
