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Thread: Thanksgiving humor

  1. Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Lexington, Kentucky, USA
    Posts
    16,883

    Thanksgiving humor

    A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a
    bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's
    mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity.

    John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently
    saying only polite words, playing soft music, and anything else he
    could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

    Finally, John was fed up, and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot
    yelled back. John shook the parrot, and the parrot got angrier and even
    ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird, and put him
    in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and
    screamed.

    Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a
    minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door
    to the freezer.

    The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said,
    'I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions.
    I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I
    fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable
    behavior.'

    John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about
    to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior,
    the bird continued, 'May I ask what the turkey did?'
    "Conservatism, I fear (so to speak), can never be cleansed of this need to instill fear. Whether it’s of black people or of street thugs or of immigrants or of terrorists or of jackbooted government agents, it’s how the conservative mind works. I don’t even think it’s always cynical and manipulative; conservatives often do see enemies under every bed. But that doesn’t mean they’re there, and it most definitely doesn’t mean the rest of us ought to make law and policy based on their nightmares."

  2. Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Louisville Kentucky USA
    Posts
    37,359
    that is cute
    Kentucky Wildcats....2012 NCAA Champions

  3. That is funny!

  4. Stole your story today. It's a good one.
    Before you act, listen. Before you react, wait. Before you spend, earn. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive.
    Before you quit, try. -- Ernest Hemingway

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